Saturday, 19 January 2008
The nine naffest moments of the most unintentionally funny programme we’ve seen all year:
1. The tragic story of Olive, an old woman being killed by a hit-and-run driver being reduced to melodramatic high farce, including excruciating camerawork that was supposed to elicit viewer sympathy such as a car running over a patently obvious dummy, her false teeth rocking limply next to the old lady’s prone body, the body itself shot from every conceivable angle as though a professional photographer was trying to get the best shot of a model.
2. The over-sensitive script that instead comes across as cripplingly crass. After the chapter on Olive ends, Sarah Heaney said: “I can’t imagine what pain Olive went through in those last few moments.”
3. The apparent random facts about the suspects being hunted and how this will help the public recognise them. “Police tell us that Junior Scarlett will jump fences to avoid capture.” What is he – man or salmon?
4. Mark Austin’s stern, though absolutely useless warning that: “Gerald has links with Derbyshire and Lincolnshire but he could be anywhere!”
5. The episode in which a fake market researcher manages to get enough information from five people to set up false identities in their name. What it probably failed to mention is that this was filmed during a village idiots’ convention and thus cynically exploited to terrify the viewing public.
6. Criminals who sift through people’s rubbish being given the more laughably sinister title of “social engineers”.
7. Sarah Heaney solemnly declaring: “Thankfully most of us won’t be the victim of violent crime, but with mobile phone theft it’s just a matter of time!” According to Manhunt over half-a-million phones will be stolen this year meaning that statistically everyone should have been a victim within a decade.
8. "He may have gone to Spain so if you're going there for Christmas, look out for him. You could even print out a picture of him from our website".
9 "He's known to be a ladies' man so he might be with a woman."
Thecustard Chats to Sharon Rooney ahead of My Mad Fat Diary DVD release
Monday 25th February sees the DVD of E4's comedy drama My Mad Fat Diary . The series, based loosely on the real life diaries of Rae Ea...
TheCustard chats to Reece Shearsmith of The Widower.
© ITV Monday 17th March sees the start of a brilliant new three-part drama based on the real life events of serial killer Malcolm Webste...
Friday Night with Jonathan Ross, BBC1
Friday 8 September 2006 Did we like it? The first show of the new series varied from the sublime to the ridiculous. Give Jonathan a decent...
David Tennant cast in US Broadchurch: My Thoughts
News broke yesterday that David Tennant has been cast in the US remake of hit ITV series Broadchurch. The first series of the UK versio...
First Look: John Simm in Prey.
ITV have released the first look at new drama Prey starring John Simm. Created and written by television newcomer Chris Lunt and dir...
The Happenings: Spooky new series for Watch
With the success of Dynamo and Derren Brown, it seems the British public can’t get enough of fancy pants magic and illusions. But in this...
First Look: Peaky Blinders
The BBC have released the first trailer for new BBC2 drama Peaky Blinders The story begins in 1919 in the lawless slum neighbourhoods of...
Coming Up directory G/H
Gastronuts CBBC – A 13-part series for children hosted by Stefan Gates, the presenter of BBC2's Cooking in the Danger Zone, explaining ...