Big Fat Quiz of 2007, Channel 4

by | Dec 30, 2007 | All, Reviews

Did we like it?

For the first half hour it was great. But then Noel Fielding and Russell Brand lost interest in being funny and instead proceeded to verbally stamp their dull jackboots of sterile surrealism over everything including David Mitchell and Jonathan Ross, who by the end had both given up, too.

What was good about it?

* David Mitchell’s rant against the Cutty Sark: “What is it? A boat, essentially a lorry. What were the tours like? This is the sails, the wind blew it and it went!”

* Eddie Large’s ‘past-life regression’: “I’m Jock, Jocky Campbell, wee Jocky Campbell. I’m fighting probably the English in the 17th or 18th century. We’re going to batter them in, I don’t know, a massive field.”

* The comments about the 2012 Olympic logo from Phil Mitchell from EastEnders (“F**kin’ diabolical”) and Simon Cowell: “Seriously, it’s terrible. Give me 500 grand and I’ll give you ten better than that!” As the logo can provoke such fury in two of the figureheads of cultural abasement in the United Kingdom the emblem for 2012 becomes a more precious national monument than Stonehenge, while Cowell’s surly assumption that he can create anything other than musical gruel from the corpses of rotten swineherds epitomised his deluded arrogance.

* John Hurt’s crisp, sardonic reading from Peter Andre’s autobiography. “As I entered I caught sight of Vanessa Feltz who winked at me as if to say, ‘good on you’.”

* Jimmy Carr: “In August, Princess Diana’s memorial concert was held. People said, ‘It’s what she would have wanted’. I’m not sure she would have wanted a memorial concert at all.”

* Thom Yorke asking a question with such a maniacal grin he seemed to be taking a break from his seasonal lobotomy, and then emitting the sort of laugh that isn’t usually heard outside of packs of squabbling hyenas.

* Noel Fielding was much funnier last year, and is often someone whom you look forward to with relish on comedy panel shows. Russell Brand can be good, too. But here, it was perhaps that they had been given carte blanche to act as they pleased with no leash of discipline that ruined the show.

What was bad about it?

* Noel Fielding and Russell Brand giving up, and from then on concocting answers which had very little to do with the actual questions, all the while being encouraged by the indiscriminate adoration and twittering laughter of their teenage girl disciples in the audience.

* To the question of what Stephen Hawking did for his 60th birthday, the pair contributed: “He killed a priest with his mind!”

* Or for a picture of the ‘past-life regressing’ Eddie Large they said he was “subjugating Sid Little (sex wise)”.

* Or for the prostate cancer awareness advert which was unusual because it starred the late Bob Monkhouse they said that it instead starred “a talking dragon”.

* Russell Brand’s weary contention that the home secretary, the defence secretary etc aren’t really secretaries because they can’t type at 100wpm.

* But worst of all was when Noel Fielding turned into a human cliché, calling the bloke who helped foil the ‘terrorist attack’ on Glasgow airport “Braveheart” with all the sadistic conceit of ITV1 curling it’s finger around a rifle trigger as part of its role in the firing squad to exterminate originality.

* Lily Allen’s futile rant about how Radiohead’s In Rainbows internet release “sets a bad precedent for young musicians” who are hoping to have a career in music. It is s far better ‘example’ than stooges who emerge from the primordial quagmire of My Space with the full support of a multi-national record label’s marketing department and yet claim to have risen to the top because of ‘word of mouth’.

* Take That asked the teams a question as if they’d just learned to read that very morning, or not in the case of Mark Owen.

* Jonathan Ross’ suit looked as if it was made from a disused Norfolk railway station.

* Lily Allen’s smile played across her face capriciously like a rapidly eroding coastline occasionally bolstered by some do-gooder environmentalists searching for the secret of maps.

* David Mitchell furrowed his brow like a pair of rutting stags raised from their reverie of skimming through beauty magazines by an out of place Rubik’s Cube.

* Rob Brydon looked on the verge of being transformed into an argumentative golf course by Donald Trump.

Luke Knowles

Luke Knowles


Editor of the website and host of the podcast. A general TV obsessive. I've been running the site since 2008 and you can usually find me in front of the TV. My Favourite show of all time is Breaking Bad with Cracker coming a close second. I feel so passionately that television can change the world and I'm doing my little bit by running this site. You're Welcome!


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