Highlights

1 Dirty Den and Little Mo in EastEnders, realising the episode was just going to be a double hander. “I hate them,” Mo said. “We’ll have to indulge in some sub-Pinteresque dialogue instead of the way we normally talk.”

2 Richard Madeley’s hatred of Christmas. On I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday – “They haven’t thought it through.” On playing parlour games – “Imagine playing silly little guessing games every day.”

3 Jennifer Saunders bashing out the script of the French & Saunders show (“We’re just finishing it”) with Alastair McGowan as Dawn French being Alastair McGowan

4 Posh and Becks discuss her pregnancy with an unintelligible Parkinson. “I love being pregnant. I just eat. As David says, I’m eating for one now.”

5 Kelly Holmes being interviewed on Lorraine Today (“Lorraine and Kelly!) and being regarded as a flop for not being a gallant loser

Lowlights

1 Alan Titchmarsh: the real thing is boring and so was the impression

2 The Making Of Bridget Jones with Colin Firth (we thought it was supposed to be Hugh Grant for most of the sketch) and Renee Zellweger

3 Ronnie Ancona’s Kerry Katona

4 Vernon Kay hosting reality show Scraping The Barrel (although the Raj Persaud impression was spot on)

5 The overlong Wizard Of Oz parody featuring Dot Cotton, Sven, Jordan, Ozzy, Michael Winner and Ruby Wax (although we loved Barbara Windsor as a munchkin)