Did we like it?
It probably should be called Britain’s Got Sob Stories but, aside from the tales of dead and sick relatives, the live programmes in this talent show series have provided us with the feelgood TV event of the year, uncovering some great acts and forcing us, reluctantly, to put our cynicism on hold for a few days.
What was good about it?
• The judges had the sense to avoid filling the final with singers. There are plenty of opportunities for them on TV. It may have been unpopular to ditch Tony (dead brother) and Damon (everyone alive and well) but we’re glad that unique acts have been given the chance to shine instead. It’s not as if the singers have all sunk without trace: operatic tenor Paul Potts and adorable girls Connie Talbot and Bessie Cursons made the final.
• Damon Scott’s puppet act, The Kombat Breakers and The Bar Wizards prove that variety need not remain dead and buried.
• There was plenty of eye candy on offer – the Crazeehorse bloke with megapecs who lifts up his wife, the member of The Free Runners who went topless and one of beatboxers Crew 82, who sadly hid behind the others most of the time.
• Amanda Holden has been far more likeable then we could ever possibly imagine.
What was bad about it?
• Our favourite act – baton twirler Craig Womersley failed to make the final. He made the biggest impact by far (and had the good sense to ditch the sequins and get more street for the semi final). We were also hoping Peter Kay-in-the-making Jake Pratt would qualify.
• After an exhaustive talent search, it is bewildering that places in the semi-finals went to warty Madonna impressionist Caroline Boyes, those stupid line dancing dogs and “magician” Dr Gore.
• The distasteful skimpy outfits worn by the troupes of little girl dancers.
• The Piers Morgan-Simon Cowell rows became uncomfortable. Both are odious chaps but at least Simon has the ability to spot talent, even if he then forces them to become bland money-making machines.
PS We’d have preferred the Barstewards to have won the final, because they’d liven up the Royal Variety Performance. But we’re not too upset about Paul Potts winning.