What to say if you liked it
The country’s premier pop music show gets a repaint and is back better than ever with new presenters Lauren Laverne, Myleene Klass and Johny Pitts.
What to say if you didn’t like it
It might as well have been called Cat Deeley UK for how it has died on its arse since she jumped ship. Three non-entities are bought in to slow its sink into oblivion.
What was good about it?
• Franz Ferdinand in red and black striped jumpers for their storming performance of Do You Want To? This live version was far better than the one on the video, but it’s telling that the best song on CD:UK was the most average song on Popworld.
• We really liked Tatu’s All About Us, despite it being almost indistinguishable from their debut single All The Things She Said. Their performance provided the most impressive eye candy on the show.
• The Mi-Tracks chart, where viewers get to vote for songs they like and vote down songs they hate. Great idea! We also like the look of the Mi-Tracks chart so far, the current number one being Kelly Clarkson’s Behind These Hazel Eyes, a song we’ve grown to love.
• Generally the show looks better lit, an improvement from the dank look it had before.
• Some reasonable performances. Charlotte Church sang live and was pretty good, as was Kanye West who, unlike a lot of rap stars, didn’t need those hot, sexy leather clad dancers to make his performance worth watching.
• Host To Coast, where new presenter Johny P, a talented up-and-comer, travels from Land’s End to John O’Groats trying to find people who share a name with a pop star. He found a shaggy-haired surfer named Lee Ryan this week. This was amusing but the joke may wear thin.
• Of the three new presenters, Lauren Laverne was the best of a bad bunch. The XFM DJ is competent unlike the other two, but she’s clearly bored. She brings a sarcastic, bitchy side to the show, which jars wildly with its sycophantic nature. She still looks just as pretty as she did in her Kenickie days.
• Mark from Westlife was questioned about coming out in an intelligent manner.
What was bad about it?
• The combination of mind-numbingly boring stock questions asked to pop stars and the sanitised PR speak of their answers to avoid actually saying anything.
• If it was a tabloid newspaper before, now it’s rip-off of Heat or OK. A lot of the show was devoted to superficial showbiz tittle tattle, mostly because of dreary Myleene Klass always wanting to get “girly gossip”. When the three presenters talked about the gossip, it didn’t look at all spontaneous as they struggled to read from cue cards.
• Mariah Carey, who reminded us of Miss Piggy, did an awful, fake English accent and it looked like CD:UK had to bend over backwards to get her to appear for four minutes.
• The “little secret” 50 Cent let Myleene into – he sometimes get stage fright. Big deal.
• The “spotlight” interview with Paul McCartney, which was broken up into two parts for no apparent reason, apart to give us two bits of boredom.
• The amateurish Johny Pitts, who was basically Science from Big Brother 6 if he wore Makosi’s afro, with a bit of Vernon Kay thrown in.
• Simpering Myleene Klass who played up to the cameras all the time.
• The blatantly obvious awkwardness between the three presenters. They had zero chemistry and seemed not to like each other much.
* The increased graphics budget has been wasted on a sickly, tacky new title sequence which looks like the one Newsround had circa 1992.
• As Johnny said before talking about England’s Ashes victory, the show has “got a bit too girly”. Sponsored by Rimmel lipstick and with neon pink seeming to have spread everywhere, it’s going to lose a lot of the lad appeal it’s had since Ant and Dec were on it.
• The painfully forced enthusiasm: “Oh my God, you actually met a Beatle!”
• The claim that they were “changing the face of music forever” by including the Mi-Tracks chart. It means CD:UK has lost one major advantage, being the first show that revealed the official Top 10 before Sunday. And if there’s anything more irrelevant than the official singles chart, it’s those thousands of “pretend” charts.
• The way the audience cheered at ridiculous moments.
• It’s a shame the gorgeous Holly Willoughby seems to have been overlooked. She did a good job presenting the Sunday shows and was much better than these new three put together.