The ONE Show, BBC1

by | Aug 14, 2006 | All, Reviews

Did we like it?

Adrian Chiles is the welcome pickaxe embedded in the fragrant, coiffured skull of a show made for depressed, middle-aged women who have to choose between this and sleeping tablets washed down with a glass of red wine, (and Emmerdale, but that’s a fate worse than death). It is, however, quite nice…

What was all nice and fluffy about it?

• Adrian Chiles verbally stomps around the nicey-nicey features with his typically Brummy bluntness. It was evident during the interview with new Dr Who assistant Freema Agyeman that he was chewing through the thick ropes that tethered him to asking questions that have been pumped, untreated, from the televisual sewage works of GMTV. He therefore took extra glee in graphically describing the scene in the last series when the other character she played was gruesomely dispatched by the Doctor. At one point later on in the show, Adrian bristled with such discomfort that he resorted to sitting on his hands.

• Calm Nadia Sawalha was a nice counterpoint to Adrian’s bluster, but it would be nice to see her tackle some of the harder-edged stories.

• Freema Agyeman was very nice and polite.

• The endearing chaos created by a live studio show; while you didn’t quite expect the Sex Pistols to turn up and turn the air blue (besides, sell-out John Lydon would be more likely to offer you the chance to buy ‘real-estate’ these days), it did make a nice change from stilted, slick shows suffocated by a drive for needless perfection that resemble Phil Collins albums narrated by Natasha Kaplinksy while a simpering Graham Norton looks on pursing his lips (watch out for that on Saturday night in 2007).

• Kate Humble’s jolly nice jaunt over Exmoor where, with the help of park ranger Richard, she tracked down a herd of deer to, well, look at them for a bit before, hilariously, Richard’s mobile phone went off scaring the timid mammals away and conniving a rather nice end to the feature. The BBC is moving more and more towards nice nature programmes such as this largely because it’s such a pleasing antidote to feature animals who don’t want to parade in front of the camera as opposed to those reality TV animals (and parasites in the case of Love Island), who smear themselves over the camera like insincerity on the face of Noel Edmonds.

• The surreal phone-in that genuinely asked people to give their opinions on whether they would complain if a woman picked at her smelly feet while sitting on a train near them.

What parts weren’t as nice, but would be described as “nice” by an uncritical, acquiescent morass of human blubber beaten into mental capitulation by 15 years of Richard and Judy (and that includes, nay picks on, anyone who has bought a novel because R&J have recommended it in their Book Club)?

• The slightly pointless, but nice none-the-less feature that looked at how far people’s tolerance for anti-social behaviour on trains be stretched before a complaint was made. Unsurprisingly, the results varied as each member of the public whose patience was tested allowed a little time for the person playing their stereo too loudly or blaring out a succession of ringtones before they politely asked them to be quiet. The only person who didn’t make a complaint was an old woman who justifiably felt a little nervous about telling a young man to move his smelly foot; fearful of violent or abusive reprisals she simply moved seats. There then followed a muddled but nice discussion that didn’t really come to any definitive conclusion.

• During the nice interview with the nice Freema Agyeman, there was a sound delay that meant Freema heard Adrian’s nice questions until about five seconds after he asked them.

• The dirty windows that looked as though a sea of grasping hands had been pawing at the studio desperate to get in and sample the nice atmosphere.

• As with any newsy magazine programme there will be moments of excruciating awkwardness. This occurred when the nice feature on red deer roaming on Exmouth was followed by an interview with a man who may have developed cancer after taking part in drug trials. Although, like Adrian, we must point out for legal reasons, that there is no evidence to link the two events (which rather makes it a little mystifying why it was on at all).

• At the end of Kate Humble’s Exmoor jolly to track down deer, she turned to nice park ranger Richard and thanked him by saying: “You’ve been a dear!” Still, a headline slot at next year’s Royal Variety Performance beckons.

• The promise of seeing Charlie Dimmock haranguing nice people, who probably don’t have much spare time, for concreting over their gardens.

Luke Knowles

Luke Knowles

14/08/2006

Editor of the website and host of the podcast. A general TV obsessive. I've been running the site since 2008 and you can usually find me in front of the TV. My Favourite show of all time is Breaking Bad with Cracker coming a close second. I feel so passionately that television can change the world and I'm doing my little bit by running this site. You're Welcome!

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