The Returned continues to impress and confuse

by | Jun 16, 2013 | All, Reviews

The multiple mysteries were fleshed out this week so I have a much better idea of where the narrative is going. I even managed to learn some of the characters names, although we’ve been introduced to a whole load more. At this rate I shall be keeping a chart. Each episode is titled as though it will focus on just one character but it doesn’t really. Which is good, I had a horror of a ‘The Syndicate’  style programme with endless flashbacks to scenes already broadcast. We did get a flashback at the beginning of this episode, but only to find out that Simon was killed on the morning of his wedding to Adele after finding out she is pregnant. We still don’t know how he died though.

Back in the present, Lena and Camille aren’t coping. Camille sneaks out and an old schoolfriend fails to recognise her. Lena bumps into Simon again and realises (through a photo taken during the flashback and still on the wall of the bar) that he is one of the Returned. I think we are being set up for a romance between those two but frankly, in this show anything can happen. Including a fight with a wolf.

Yep, you did read that right, one of our new characters, the bar owner, returns to his old family home in the woods and wrestles a wolf with his bare hands, then his formerly dead brother turns up (last week’s subway murderer) and he hits him round the head with a shovel. Which was surprisingly hilarious, especially as it is very difficult for anyone who has watched the Twilight movies to find wolves scary. So yes, before this gets super complicated, the bar owner is taken in for questioning after Lucy the Waitress is discovered in the subway. Despite being stabbed 12 times and having had a dog nibble on her liver, she is still alive. Just. Does this mean no one can die now? Anyone else remembering the last series of Torchwood…

Anyway, turns out the bar owner (yeah, I did say I didn’t know everyone’s names) was suspected of the original serial killings 7 years previously. But presumably it was actually his brother. I highly doubt anything in this series is that simple.

Back to Simon, and he’s hungry, so he goes to a diner and beats up the owner when he can’t be served. In a nice touch, Mrs Costa is there (she had no problem getting food I noticed), so I guess she’s ok. Simon gets arrested and comes face to face with Adele’s new fiancé, who happens to be the Chief of Police. Understandably, CoP is a tad concerned to have a serial killer on the loose and his wife to be’s long dead ex turn up. But he’s a coper that one. Adele’s just decided Simon is a ghost, fair play really. The only wince-worthy moment came when Simon uttered the words ‘We’ll sleep when we are dead’ the morning of his death. Come on writers, you can do better than that.

In other clichés, there must be something in the water as the plumbing sounds like someone after a particularly spicy curry and the water level in the dam has gone down again. Quite how water and resurrections go together remains to be seen but right now it’s going to take a fair old leap of logic (maybe the town is on a rift in space and time…) To make matters worse, Pierre, the doctor/priest guy is going on about how it happened before then smiling enigmatically. I’ve decided I don’t like him. His smile is creepy.

Also a creepy smiler is young Victor. Will he ever speak? Seriously, I hope the actor doesn’t have a contract where you get paid more for a speaking role. This week he decides to jump out of the window (nice Doctor lady lives several floors up) and survives without a scratch. Which doesn’t particularly worry Doc, as she clearly can’t have children, being a victim of the serial killer! Now, does this mean she somehow survived or she is an earlier return? I have no idea of anything anymore. Frankly, by the end of this series I shall probably be doubted my own existence!

Read our Review of Episode 1

Contributed by Victoria Prior 

Luke Knowles

Luke Knowles


Editor of the website and host of the podcast. A general TV obsessive. I've been running the site since 2008 and you can usually find me in front of the TV. My Favourite show of all time is Breaking Bad with Cracker coming a close second. I feel so passionately that television can change the world and I'm doing my little bit by running this site. You're Welcome!


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