1 The failure of the programme to work as a car-crashy trashy reality show or as a serious political exercise, despite lofty words from presenter Jonathan Maitland (“bringing politics back to you, giving ordinary people the chance to become politicians”) and the judges – Kelvin ‘Yob’ McKenzie, John Sergeant and Lorraine Kelly (who remarked: “People are sick to death of being treated like beebies.”)
2 It took only two minutes before we heard the phrase “lock ’em up and throw away the key.” Yes, it was full of reactionaries and we fear that reformed fraudster Roddie (ban immigration, 95 per cent of prisoners are scum) will emerge as the winner
3 We hated several of the contestants, especially the advocate of public flogging – a well-dressed skinhead called Sam. “I bloody enjoyed that. I’d make him prime minister tomorrow,” said Kelvin. Our favourite was the candidate who demanded a Bank Holiday in honour of Bruce Forsyth
4 The environmentalist who did his worthwhile campaign no good by bringing a guitar and singing: “Wake up, wake up, the Earth is calling.”
5 Michelle the devout Christian who claimed foreigners in the NHS don’t have any pride in their work (Kelvin Yob was in full agreement.) “All the people who are foreign or coloured or whatever word they use are going to think I’m horrible,” she said. They’d be spot on.